I am not such a big fan of change. I am quite on the sentimental side. Infact, I attach sentiments to little things and forget about the bigger picture automatically being reluctant to change when it comes; but now, I am super grateful for change. Although I might show a bit of haste when life situation switches up, but one thing I am sure of is my gratitude to God.
Recently, I took a huge step. It might necessarily not be a huge step to some of y’all but it is to me because of my introverted nature. I finally answered the clarion call to serve Nigeria and this has been a worthy experience.
Anxiety has dealt with me though and this isn’t even a joke. Seeing my call up letter only to burst into tears for the fear of unknown was one of the most confusing time in a long time. Detachment for me isn’t an easy thing. Not necessarily detachment though but changing space and not getting to see certain people for a long time is pretty tasking mentally and I think that was one of the reasons for my outburst.
I left Warri for Rivers around 10am on the 21st of October and that was the beginning of my nightmare. So I thought. All through the journey my mind was totally occupied with a lot. Still fear of the unknown. I begged God. I begged him to fill me with grace and peace because at that point, I needed it. I needed him. I am an introvert. Socialising is difficult. Speaking up is difficult. How was I expected to cope in a totally different space? How was I expected to get myself together with unfamiliarity?
I finally arrived Nonwa Gbam Tai in Rivers State. My uneasiness started. Getting to the gate of my camp wasn’t easy at all. Lord knows I contemplated my arrival. I could just travel somewhere else and lie to my parents about my location, I could just stay, do the registration and ask for an exit. All those feelings I contemplated but then again, Rukky needs to get used to change.
Stay Tuned for The Next Episode.