I basically had to read and make my research before I had an idea of my title for the blog post. Truth is, I don’t know what forgiveness is. My clue on what it feels like to let go is seamless. So, today’s blog post is dedicated to those who are trying to mature from their hurt, those who are incognizant of what it feels like to “move on and blossom”. Today’s blog post is dedicated to myself and every individual ditto.
I want to tell you a story. A short narrative. I use to know a girl. She had a very loving personality. People say she looked mean though but at the end of the day, she seemed super nice once you got to know her. Funny thing is, as sweet as she was, she didn’t want to let anybody into her world because of her fears; but she had a couple of persons around. I mean, the opposite sex. Finally, someone came and swept her off her feet and that was it! She became attached to this Mr X. Mr X was everything to her regardless of what people told her and how people read his personality. No one ever agreed that Mr X merited my friend. Their love story went in for some months till a particular event occurred. My friend had her birthday party and thankfully her friends were there to make it worthwhile. Mr X was also present with his friends. As much as my friend wanted to enjoy every bit of her day, she couldn’t because a particular of hers had her hands all over Mr X. My friend tried to brush off whatever it was that was going through her head and trusted the both of them. I mean, we were friends and that’s how friends should act. Trust each other. This was the beginning of her hurt.
In essence, my friend found out that Mr X ate from my friend’s “cookie jar” and the “cookie jar” of others. Everyone else expected a reaction from her but she there wasn’t any. She sailed on like she lost nothing and still kept up with the relationship. She loved the both of them so dearly and for that she wasn’t willing to let either of them go. My friend lived with the hurt. As much as Mr X hurt her, she couldn’t bare to see him go. At some point, he blacked out for a while, came back and ended everything. It was mental torment for her.
Four years later, she is stronger and prettier than ever and is cruising in clearer waters but mentally, she is still a mess. My friend is still in mental bondage from her past.
Phew!!! Now that was a long story. Forgive me.
I believe we have been hurt in one way or the other; especially by things and people that we’ve loved and cherished the most. While some of us found it easy to move on and let go from the hurt literally, some of us still struggle to move ahead of the excruciating torment. Everyday we relive those thoughts and battle with them. We want to forgive and grow but we find it hard to do so because of how challenging it seems.
How do we move on and reach a state of forgiveness?
First of all, we must recognize that forgiveness is a commitment to a personalized process of change. In other for us to move on, we must first acknowledge our emotions and the harm done to us in order to release them. In other words, Acceptance. Savy the virtue of forgiveness and how it can improve your life. Be ready to forgive the person of memories that hurt you; and finally, move away from being the victim and release the control that the negative emotions and thoughts have over you.
Once you let go of this animosity, you start to notice that the sentiments that you attached to it wasn’t worth it. You might even start to find compassion and understanding.
I hope that one way or the other, you find this post relatable and you apply it to your daily livings.